Ever had those times when someone does something to you and you try to move on but are having a rough time? I am having one of those times now at work with the people I work with. I have confronted to no avail. I was told I was paranoid. You see, someone said I said something about someone but no one has the guts to say what I said. The injustice is what is bothering me more than anything. It hurts in my chest. The more I try to let it go the more I hold on to it.
Why do I care what others think of me? Why is that so important? I guess more than anything I want to make things right. That is kind of hard to do when you don't know what you did. The hardest part of all of this, I have to work with these people on a daily basis. I can't just ignore them. Maybe I can a little bit but I can't all together.
A good friend told me yesterday there is a good chance I haven't done anything other than stand strong for what I believe. That can be intimidating. True, but the hurt is still there. What do I do with the hurt? How do I move on?
Enter, God. I can't do this alone. I have cried out to him so much over this situation. I have found myself literally on my knees begging for wisdom and guidence - some relief. Last night our study was on forgiving debts - all kinds of debts. That means forgiving people who don't know any better. That means putting the past behind and moving forward. That is so tough for me to do for some reason. Why?
Lord, help me today please. Send me some joy and open my eyes so that I don't miss it. Let that be my focus instead of pettiness and caddiness. Help me to be above that. Heal me please. Let me know the truth and may that set me free.
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