To be a displaced employee - what does that feel like? The range of emotions are so numerous I can hardly begin to explain. First there is the shock. I am sitting in a room with 28 of my co-workers. We know something is up but really not 100% sure what is going on. Then, the bomb drops. I figured it was something when the director to be could hardly keep from passing out. He looked like crap. I would too if I was in his shoes and frankly, if he hadn't looked like crap I would have been a little disappointed. Would have fueled my fire.
What did I hear after the words "ADS (that is my department name) is desolving" and "jobs are being reallocated to other areas"? It is a little jumbled. The company has implemented a program called Operational Excellence affectionately referred to as "OE." I at this point I have nothing nice to say about this program. Sure, at the root it scientifically roots out access waste. Apparently our department was full of waste. To an extent, I would agree. It was. But to completely dissolve it - that is another matter entirely. Seems a little harsh.
When I step back and really think about the reality of the situation - removing emotions - I know this was needed. I know this is the right thing. I know there is "waste" in our department. I know all of this. What gets me is that people are not waste and that is what it feels a little bit like right now. How do we get rid of people in a friendly way? We offer them jobs within the company - 21 positions to fill 28 lost jobs. Those jobs are only open to us which I appreciate. If the job is not filled then they will look else where. If we do not find a job then we get a severence package equal to 2 weeks of pay for every year we have been there. That would equate to 26 weeks of pay. The chances of me getting one of the jobs we can post for is good. I have a good reputation within the division. However, for the position I currently hold one of the three of us will lose our job because there are only two positions to fill. Nice. That means my work load will increase. Nice again. But I would have a job. Again, this needed to happen.
The emotional side of me is screaming right now. YOU ARE MESSING WITH MY WORLD! I don't want to do a resume. I don't want to post for positions. I don't even know if I want to work for a company that is so completely out of control right now. This doesn't just effect me. It effects everyone I work with - everyone. I just feel betrayed to a degree. And I don't know how they could have made it better. At least the elephant is out of the bag or whatever that phrase is. We can move forward. We have known something was going to happen - have known that for some time now. The when was what was outstanding.
But, I go back to the truth. It is a simple truth - God is in control. He is orchestrating this entire process. He reminded me of his simple promise when Timothy came up to me when I got home and just wanted to read books. My world might be rocked but his isn't. The most important things are still the most important things. My job is a means to care for the most important things. I was praying even this morning that we could find a way to homeschool but that God would have to move mountains to make that happen because we aren't seeing that as an option right now. Maybe he is moving mountains. Maybe we are suppose to go to Huntsville. Tangela sent me several jobs or maybe Dave is suppose to get a job. Or who knows. Who knows. That is what I am praying about right now - wisdom. I don't want to make an emotional decision. I want to make a godly decision. Besides, I will be forced to do some of those things I have put off for so long - like creating a resume. Need to get that done this weekend. It will also motivate Dave to do the same.
Wow - what a crazy week. And yesterday we learned that one of Dave's former students lost a brother to suicide. He touched many lives that we know so I feel like we are finding people that knew him all over the place. So very, very sad. So many emotions.... I think I will just go to bed.
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