My Hubby

I have to tell you something. I have a best friend. It is a he and sometimes I forget that he is my best friend. Sometimes I don't treat him like my best friend - I treat him not so nice.

That is what happened yesterday. My nerves had been grated and I was fiesty but not in a good way. I was mean. that wasn't like me. What was going on? Why was I so PO'ed at the world and in particular, at my hubby?

I could list the outside factors that seemed very logical - dishes to do, laundry to fold, floors to mop, floors to vacuum, toys to pick up. Why was I doing all of this after working all day? So, I put on my most unattractive attitude - martidum - and quickly picked things up. The main focus on where to put said toys was a large trash can outside. I mean, if we didn't have all these toys then we (I) wouldn't have to pick them up! The fire in my thought process was being fanned and all the sudden there was a bonfire. Logs were being added. Things not usually ment for burning were being added (plastic cups, stuffed animals, legos, toy cars, tools sitting on my kitchen counter, games, papers, ect, ect...).

To calm my frustration I decided I needed a nice candle to burn, literally. I thought maybe the aroma would be therapy for my soul. Ironically, I couldn't find a lighter. So I had this amazing bonfire and nothing to light it with, literally.

What can be hotter than fire? What is sharper than a sword? My mouth. And the words I wish I could take back simply spilled out. Once they were out there I looked at my husband. He was hurt. Very, very hurt. He was already down I and came in for the final kick. It wasn't intential but it must have been on my mind because the words flowed out without any analysis on my part. I hate it when that happens!

He went off to sooth his aching soul and then he said something I will never forget. He said, "Sometimes I think you would be better off without me." Oh wow. I deserved it. Dave has never been one to keep things to himself.

As I drove off to a party, of all things, last night I had time to think and pray. I realized as I prayed that my husband is my best friend and yet I wasn't treating him as such. I was treating him more like a kid. He is a 41 year old man. He deserves a little more respect than that. He deserves to have a bad day, week, month every once in a while. And he deserves to have a wife that will let him figure things out without her ever so helpful "encouragement."

I love him and wouldn't trade him for the world. He is my Dave-O, Handsome Boy, Knight in Shinning Armor. All of his expectations and mine for that matter, might not be met yet but that doesn't change the fact that I love him. I hope he can know that.