Wow. I can't believe we are already at 12 weeks! The last 8 weeks have flown by which tells me the next eight will probably do the same. And I am so excited. In these next twelve weeks I should be able to start to feel the baby move. I think I am looking forward to that more than anything. To feel a baby inside moving around is amazing. I look forward to when Dave can feel the baby and when Will can. Every step makes it more real.
Yesterday I got to see the little monkey moving around in there. It was so fun. I saw him or her arching their back and kicking their little legs. Then, it was very quiet for some time as it nuzzled closer to me inside a little pocket. There is plenty of room in there right now but it wanted to snuggle. Will use to do the same thing. I don't mind. My babies can snuggle with me as long as they want and whenever they want (even before I get to snuggle with them). The heartbeat is starting to slow down. It was down to 153 yesterday down from the highest of 183 and more recently, 173. I remember, Will's did the same thing. Once it got in the 140's it stayed there which is probably a good thing since they don't like it to go much lower than that.
When asked about how I was feeling yesterday the answer was just tired. I feel more tired now that I did earlier on even though I know I was very, very tired then too. Our schedule is a little too full at the moment with the normal day to day activities. I use the weekend to catch up on sleep and house hold chores. That poor laundry, it just doesn't get done unless it is the weekend. Thankfully, we have enough clothes to get us through so not a huge deal - just something to do.
Last week I moved into my maternity clothes. I could still wear my pants but the shirts were just not long enough. So, maternity clothes it is. They are too big at the moment but more comfortable than stressing about my fly being open because I have elastic holding my button together. Besides, I can wear the clothes with pride. Am I showing? Yes. Am I showing to people who don't know I am pregnant? Not yet. That is okay. Keeping them guessing is kind of fun!
When I think about how we have been blessed, I have a new perspective on being a mom. It is an honor, not a chore. It is a priviledge, not a burden. To feel the love of a child is something I cannot articulate. It is similar to the love I have for my husband but entirely different. I think it is more the like the love God has for us, his children. You can't describe it but you know it is there and it is amazing. Thank you Lord for the gift of children.
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